232. I throw myself on the bed

and pretend I’m having sex with John Lennon.
...

231. My grandparents have separate bedrooms--

a good thing, too, because I can’t imagine those two old people having sex.
...

230. I turn down the volume

to a setting that I know will still irritate Deems, but he won’t say anything. He’ll just go to his bedroom to stew.
...

229. “TURN DOWN THAT CATERWAULING,”

Deems yells up the steps.
...

228. I drop the album on the record player

turntable and play “Long Tall Sally” at full volume. Paul McCartney.
...

227. But it doesn’t do any good

to sass back, so I snatch the album from Deems and go to my room, a cavernous attic with dormer windows.
...

225. I HATE when Deems acts like that.

It’s not MY fault my parents hate each other and don’t want me.
...

224. “Harrumph,” Deems says, looking over

the Beatles’ album with angry blue eyes. “A little support money would be more helpful than this clap-trap.”
...

223. “You mean HE’S in town again?”

Meems says, a bit of a sneer in her tone.
...

222. I tell Meems and Deems

about my father’s visit and show them the Beatles’ album.
...

221. Other than being old and irrelevant,

they act like parents anywhere, perhaps stricter than my friends’ parents. Still, there are ways around them.
...

220. I think they love me, but

are a bit perplexed at being parents again.
...

219. I like them okay; they give me

a weekly allowance and buy me just about everything I need and ask for.
...

218. I don’t remember much about my mother,

but I call my grandmother “Meems” and my grandfather “Deems.”
...